Claudius reflects again on how well-suited Lan Wangji is to the art of composing burn books -- moreso than Claudius himself. Truly, there has never been a man more like a rotten loquat. In looks, fair-faced and appealing; in conversation, coarse and charmless.

A shame, but there's still some entertainment to be had. "The men of Yunmeng are bold, I see. Do you want to hear me say it?" His smile turns flirtatious as he takes Jiang Wanyin's arm. "I mean," he says, "I'm interested in you."